You know you're from Arizona when...

YOU KNOW YOU'RE FROM ARIZONA WHEN. . .
 

• "You can say Hohokam and no one thinks you're making it up. 
• You no longer associate rivers or bridges with water.
• You know that a "swamp cooler" is not a happy hour drink. 
• You can contemplate a high temperature of 120 degrees as "not all that bad, after all it's a dry heat."
• You have learned to expertly maneuver your vehicle under any traffic conditions using only two fingers; a skill usually learned initially in July.
• You know that you can make sun tea outside faster than instant tea in your microwave. 
• You have to run your air conditioner in the middle of winter so that you can use your fireplace. 
• The water coming from the "cold" tap is hotter than that from the hot" tap. 
• You can correctly pronounce the following words: "Saguaro", "Tempe", "Gila Bend", "San Xavier del Bac", "Canyon de Chelly", "Mogollon Rim", "Cholla", and "Tlaquepacque", "Ajo". 
• It's noon on a weekday in July, kids are on summer vacation, and not one single person is moving on the streets. 
• Hot air balloons can't fly because the air outside is hotter than the air inside. 
• You buy salsa by the gallon. 
• Your Christmas decorations include a half a yard of sand and 100 paper bags. 
• You think a red light is merely a suggestion. 
• All of your out-of-state friends start to visit after October but clear out come the end of April. 
• You think someone driving while wearing oven mitts is clever. 
• Most of the restaurants in your town have the first name "El" or "Los." 
• You think six tons of crushed rock makes a beautiful yard. 
• You can say 115 degrees without fainting. 
• Vehicles with open windows have the right-of-way in the summer.
  People break out coats when the temperature drops below 70. 
• You discover, in July, it only takes two fingers to drive your car. 
• The pool can be warmer than you are. 
• Most people will not drink tap water unless they are under dire conditions. 
• Monday Night Football starts at 7:00 instead of 9:00 
• You realize Valley Fever isn't a disco dance. 
• People with black cars or have black upholstery in their car are automatically assumed to be from out-of-state or nuts. 
• You know better than to get into a car with leather seats if you're wearing shorts.
• Announcements for Fourth of July events never end with "in case of rain..." 
• You eat hot chilis to cool your mouth off. 
• You know that a seat belt makes a pretty good branding iron. 
• You know that you can get a sunburn through your car window. 
• You have to explain to out-of-staters why there is no daylight savings time 
• When someone asks how far you live from a location, it's always in terms of minutes, not miles. 
• Your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, "What if I get knocked out and end up lying on the pavement and cook to death?" 
• You realize that asphalt has a liquid state."

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